I'm okay today

I've decided that even while I am freaking out, I am okay. There are lots of things going on that add to the anxiety, and so I have reason to be a bit on edge... I am moving in 2 weeks, I am starting classes in five weeks, at which time my life will change dramatically, and now I have this guy that I am spending time with. And he is so nice and said that my nervousness was attractive because it made me genuine and vulnerable....(sigh).

So I am starting to realize that things will be okay. Yesterday I made the near-fatal decision of going to an athletic store to look for swimming shampoo that might preserve what isn't totally brittle on my head. (I am a swimming-fiend this summer)They didn't have it, and in my no-food-low-blood sugar-state, I decided I needed a new outfit for our hiking date this weekend. (yet another way I am such a girl! hehe)

As I was trying things on, I realized that I was teetering on the brink of buying everything in the store, to walking out with nothing. Don't you think we just have way too many options these days anyway? I ended up not liking one pair of shorts I tried on, and bought only one of those spaghetti-strap, supportive sport tops, which actually looks pretty sexy on me, if I may say so myself. So, while I am happy with my purchase, I realize that i need to eat before I shop.


I am realizing how desperately I need to stick with God these days. In my state of anxiety (and somewhere there is some shock that a guy wants a second date with me) I need to turn to him. In my state of feeling overwhelmed, I need Him to direct me how to take things a step at a time, and to ask for His peace as I conquer one detail at a time. I need His grace as I try to figure things out...I need to lay those things I cannot figure out at all (like will I marry this guy) and the things I would like to control (like how much i am liked by others) in His hands. And I need help for all of this.